December 2011
1 post
“The irony of multitasking is that it’s exhausting; when you’re doing...”
– Twyla Tharp
October 2011
1 post
NYC Style or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and...
New York can be daunting to the traveler or transplant with low style-self-esteem. It is a notoriously fashionable place, home to very celebrated fashion weeks, Fifth Avenue, SoHo, a few seasons of Top Model, a handful of H&Ms, and even an American Eagle in Times Square. People from all over the world come to New York to shop at the original Macy’s, the original Saks, and any of our many...
September 2011
3 posts
"Are you there, God? It's me, Blogologues." Sept....
Friends!
I’m performing in this month’s installment of Lively Production’s Blogologues series entitled “Are you there, God? It’s me, Blogologues.” It’s a sketch show. You’ll like it.
Monday, September 26th at Under St, Mark’s. 7:00pm and 9:00pm. Ticket price includes a beer! (or beer price includes a show, whatever makes you happier!) ...
August 2011
1 post
July 2011
1 post
May 2011
2 posts
An Open Letter to "Children International"
Dear Unassuming Charming Young Person with a Clipboard,
Well, the thermometer has jumped above 65 degrees for a couple of weeks and finals are over, so I guess it’s your time to shine. You saw that Craig’s List ad boasting “$1500-2000” a month for an “outgoing” and “personable” type who wants to “help others” and “spend time...
WOMPCITY: LIVE May 13th and 14th
Pieces from wompcity will be featured in the Blogologues presented by Lively Productions. I’ll be there on Friday night making sure they are WORD PERFECT. You should check this show out. Everyone involved is incredibly talented and lovely. DO IT.
Lively Productions presents Blogologues: Sex, Drugs and Interwebs, conceived and developed by co-artistic directors, Allison Goldberg and Jen...
April 2011
3 posts
WatchI wrote and directed this. You should watch it.
By Request: 500 Words of Bodice-Ripping Romance
In high school, my friend, Cara used to give us all erotic fiction for our birthdays. I always had to hide mine from my mother out of sheer embarassment. I had to read a variety of material for seminar english, but we both knew that “Secret Sex” wasn’t on that list. Cara is getting married this year, and as a gift for her lingerie shower which I couldn’t attend, I sent...
The Catfood Sandwich, or Adventures in Crumbling...
Today I’m quitting smoking for the fifth time. At least, by my count it’s five now.
On my third attempt last May, I decided to put down cigarettes and pick up exercise and healthy eating habits instead. So, I picked up a copy of SELF magazine and got started. After work, instead of my usual 5:30 pm cigarette and power nap, I would go for a 30 minute jog in Riverside Park. ...
March 2011
7 posts
Birthday Box (a conversation with my father)
Dad: Did you get the box?
Me: The box is being held at the post office. I'm going to pick it up after work.
Dad: If you would like to try to guess what is in it, I can give only this clue: you left it in the basement.
Me: Peppiment?
Me: any number of embarrassing fiction and or poetry I wrote on the typewriter?
Me: A Brandy cassette tape?
Dad: No, to both of your guesses.
Dad: You think I would spend postage to send you a brandy cassette tape???????????????? Let’s get serious here.
Me: I don't know. It could be a lot of things. I spent a solid 12 years hanging out in that basement.
Dad: And this was one of your most important (hence postage-worthy) piece(s) of equipment.
Me: Did you send me a boombox? A sewing machine? The CD burner?
Me: It's the gymnastic mats, isn't it?
1 tag
For Clay's digital birthclay - I'm pulling for a...
INTERACT WITH WOMP CITY: I am not myself
Maybe you’ve seen these two posts by me and my friend Jon. Maybe you too have a picture of yourself where you look at it and think “Who is that person? Because I’m not that person.” Write a brief caption about that person-who-is-not-you-but-is-you and submit it with the picture to me at wompcity@gmail.com.
This is perfect for those weird commercial headshots you had...
February 2011
4 posts
IntuitionLTD.net Deep Pop. Hillbilly Thrash. ... →
Click the link.
In which Max imagines my life as a sitcom
Maxwell: so new york
Amanda: totes new york
Maxwell: she's in her 20s, future unsure, but people are taking notice and she's on her way up. cue pop music as you exit the studio onto the busy street
Amanda: ba da da da da-da-da
Maxwell: helping an old lady who dropped an apple, saying hi to kids walking the opposite way, waving at firemen in the truck, holding a door for a man with his hands full
Amanda: I don't do any of those things
Maxwell: as you get to your door and pull out your keys, a dog sniffs your leg and you bend down to say hi
Amanda: again. not happening
Maxwell: you're ruining this
Amanda: fine. continue.
Maxwell: this is you ruining my opening title sequence. Okay. You bend down to say hi, and the dog suddenly jumps and licks your face. the owner is horrified, but you smile and laugh it off, opening your front door and walking in the camera pans up to reveal the address: 384 Possibility Lane
Amanda: what the hell borough is possibility street in? Staten Island?
Maxwell: Dreamville
Amanda: Brooklyn, Manhattan, Queens, The Bronx, Dreamville
Maxwell: Dreamville is a recently discovered trash floatilla in the hudson
Amanda: wait - can my sitcom take place in cheery-post-apocalyptic-new york?
Maxwell: city needs the space, tethers the trash island to the bottom, starts dumping recyclables into the river
Amanda: "well, we can't call it trash island..." "let's just call it Dreamville"
Maxwell: because in post apocalyptic new york...things are looking up
Amanda: Dreamville - because it couldn't possibly get any worse
January 2011
4 posts
I've wanted this for all the years I've been on... →
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Facebook?
New Year - New Prompts!
openyourart:
Hey Friends! Thanks for all your awesome support over the past few months as we got the ball rolling. We’re currently accepting prompt submissions and we highly encourage you to submit! Our prompts generally include the words “create”, “explore”, “show”, “theatricalize” or any other such verb that promotes action. What would you like to see?
Check it out. SUBMIT SUBMIT...
“You have an iPhone now. There’s no excuse not to tumble now whenever you...”
– Max Schneller
December 2010
8 posts
The Third Heat
Justin Timberlake wants to be on SNL. JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE IS THE THIRD HEAT.
the sucks
Abbrv. “The thing that sucks about that…”
Org. American English, 2 glasses of Red Wine
Examples: “The sucks is I didn’t even like Garden State that much and he was bawling.”
“Sure it’s warm, but the sucks is this hat looks like it may have once had fake dreads attached to it.”
“The sucks is when you find out they’re all...
whites of my eyes
MYSTERY!
Ever since returning to New York from Chicago on Monday, my eyes have been bloodshot and dry. At first I was blaming the off-brand contact solution at my parents’ house, but the problem continues despite rinsing my lenses and wearing my glasses for a few days.
Drops provide some relief, but I basically look like I’ve just sobbed for a good four hours and gotten really high...
Question of the night
I’m sure you have a list of people you wish you had made a move on when you had the chance. If you don’t, well, good for you and your uncanny ability to always strike while the iron is hot and/or inability to feel regret.
Personally, I have such a list. And I’m going to post it on the Internet.
PSYCH! (Come on. This isn’t my livejournal.)
I had dinner tonight with my...
Challenge Part Two: Revenge of the Challenge
Here we go again. Forcing myself to write daily. Onward!
I was going to keep up my October momentum, whatever it was that I had built, but circumstances changed. I had nothing particularly productive to share, so I decided not to share anything at all. I’m not saying that I’ll have anything better to say now, but I’m going to find a way to layer it into something...
November 2010
4 posts
WatchLook what we did!
openyourart:
Brought to you this lovely week by Tai Verley.
Prompt: Create an open that depicts a time you knew something was WRONG, but you did it anyway.
TRUTH comes in LIST Form.
Thanks to Amanda for helping me!!
An open plea to the Hale and Hearty at 30th and...
Dear Hale and Hearty at 30th and 7th -
There’s a brisk wind picking up off the Hudson and the air no longer smells like hot garbage and sticky flesh, so you know winter is well on its way to New York City. This is when I stop bringing salads to work and seek out hot meals. Hot meals like soup. Soup like creamy tomato orzo. Creamy tomato orzo from you, the Hale and Hearty.
I know...
October 2010
25 posts
Like this post if you've read this blog in the...
Let’s get real for a hot minute here, friends.
This has been a productive month for me, and while I didn’t write on this blog every single day, I wrote more in this past month than in the previous three months combined.
I did this exercise for me, not really expecting anyone to pay attention to it. But a lot of you did pay attention! It’s been surprising and it’s meant...
Does this answer your question, Mr. President?
Like a lot of people I know (liberal-arts educated liberal artist types) I voted for Obama. I’m also on some sort of Obama email list in which I get emails that appear to be from the President.
This was cool for maybe a week. Two years later, the novelty has worn off. Yes, I plan on voting on November 2nd, Mr. President. Please stop spamming me.
Sometimes, though, the subjects of the...
WatchThis is how I spent my Sunday.
openyourart:
Brought to you by Amanda Dieli, with off-camera scene partner Jen Jamula. Prompt: write a scene between you and your evil twin. Made entirely on a MacBook (filmed on the iSight, edited in iMovie and GarageBand) shot in a couple of takes (obviously).
Excuses, excuses...
This weekend, I did write. This time on Final Draft. Sunday, I filmed what I wrote, and you’ll get to see it on Thursday when it’s posted on openyourart.tumblr.com and subsequently reblogged here.
It’s certainly not a masterpiece, but I slept really well last night knowing that I actually did something creative start to finish this weekend. And since I had some help from my...
Full Moon
For the last two full moons, I’ve noticed pretty big spikes in my ability to cope with stress and stressful situations. I know all this mess about the moon making people crazy is just folklore and not really based in any verified science, but I’m noticing a correlation.
It’s not just the stress. I’m also noticing that my hair grows faster during the full moon. My nails,...
"Fighting SAD" with Charmaine.
Good Evening, Ladies!
Thank you all so very much for joining me here at the Community House on this brisk October evening. If you’re like me, you’ve welcomed the chilly Autumn air with a chunky fair isle sweater-trench, some decorative Indian-corn, and a deep plum lip-color - it’s so now, Ladies!
Tonight we’re going to talk about rediscovering ourselves to combat...
predictive text
I sent the same text to a few friends last night, which was supposed to read:
“Are you planning on coming to the show tomorrow night?”
For some reason, the predictive text on my ultra classy, and extremely modern LG Shine decided to send the following instead:
“Are you planning on boning to the show tomorrow night?”
This is the same awesome little phone that thinks I...
100th post! Clip show!
I’ve had this tumblr for a little over two years and I’ve just now hit 100 posts. Yeesh. But in celebration of making it this far, let’s look at the highlights.
I broke up with the H&M at 34th and 7th.
I gave Candice a wake-up call.
I got confused about Heath Ledger’s last movie.
I celebrated the return of self-regenerating pancakes at the IHOP, and the unrelated...
Feeling v. Perception
Cold medicine.
Feeling: I’m so on top of it today! So what if I had crazy night sweats last night, that was just the fever breaking, right? RIGHT. I’m totally fine to be at work today. No, the underside of my nose isn’t chapped…that badly. I’m great. TOTALLY GREAT. Sorry, you’ll need to speak up a little bit because my ears are popped, but other than...
An apology to my one reader.
Dear Singular Reader of this blog,
First, thank you for participating in this exercise with me, and for upholding your end of the deal. Normally, I would say it’s easier to be the reader, as you are the more passive of the two of us, but I know getting through my writing can be somewhat arduous, so I think we’re equally challenged here. Me writing daily, you tolerating daily. ...